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An Activist’s Life, by Thomas Leavitt » Blog Archive » Hard to believe I share the same planet with these folks…

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December 2nd, 2003
Living on the same planet?

Hard to believe I share the same planet with these folks…

[… also check out the “Objective: Shutdown Landover Baptist” section, and the “Objective: For Kidz” page… how about Habu’s Corner: “Hey, Habu… How many goes do you have?” Answer: “I don’t know… I lost count!” (with a miserable expression on the elephant’s face), or the “Spiritual Safety Tip: What should you do if you find an Athiest … “tell a parent or pastor right away!” and “Avoid talking to them!”

Yikes. Freaky.

UPDATE: Oh… my… god… i just discovered that when you drag the mouse pointer across the image of the lamb’s head at the top of the page, it spins, and goes “baa”. No parody can live up to the standard set by a site like this… who needs Landover Baptist when you have the real thing?!?

Super yikes!

-Thomas]

Objective: Christian Ministries

Here’s some sample content:

CULT ALERT:

(March 28, 2003) Dr. Troy Franklin, OBJECTIVE occult expert, has brought to our attention a disturbing new danger to weak-spirited Christians and unsaved persons that we feel needs to be reported.

As he tells it, while out at a local supermarket shopping for food for his cat, Dr. Franklin noticed one of those small tents advertising “Free Rock Chip Repair” that have been springing up in our nation’s parking lots. Curious, he went to enquire about getting a ding in his windshield sealed, only to learn that the person manning the tent had other intentions, namely to try and recruit Dr. Franklin into a cult!

Fortunately, the good doctor has become quite immune to cultic recruiting ploys from his years studying their tactics, and thus he was able to extricate himself from the situation with his soul unharmed. However, those less skilled in their Faith — and especially those of false faiths or no faith at all — would have soon found themselves back at the cult headquarters doing all manner of unspeakable rites and blasphemies… or maybe even brainwashed into manning a tent of their own.

For the safety of your soul, do not be tempted by the lure of impulse rock chip repair from strangers in parking lots. It may say free, but it could cost you your soul! If you need your windshield fixed, go to a qualified Christian repair shop.

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This entry was posted on Tuesday, December 2nd, 2003 at 12:48 am, and is filed under Living on the same planet?. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

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